Culture. There is so much wrapped up in this term. It's the details of how a people live, think, talk, act, interact, eat, work, relax--in short, how they go about their lives. But it's not only the observable "how" that makes up a people's culture. It is also the "why" behind it. What are the underlying values of a culture that drives them to behave the way they do? It can be harder to figure out the "why."

As I've lived in Turkey over the past seven years or so I've loved both the simple observation of 'how' people here go about life as well as the more complex seeking to understand the 'why.' I have a long way to go in both, but here are three aspects of Turkish culture that I've come to value.

1) Taking Shoes Off At The Door

When you enter a home in Turkey, you must take off your shoes. In general your host will provide you with a pair of warm slippers (or sandals, if it is during the summer months) to wear while in their home. The obvious reasons behind this custom are clear. In a society where walking or public transportation is the normal mode of getting from point A to point B, shoes worn outside the house can get very filthy. Understandably, people don't want all of that tracking throughout their house! A deeper reason is the underlying overall value that women here put on cleanliness in the home. They take great pride in spotless windows, scrubbed floors, and sanitized countertops (even pre-Covid!), and they work hard to maintain their homes in this way.

2) Long Greetings

In Turkey there is a certain script you must follow in order to greet someone in a culturally appropriate way. It has many expressions, both verbal and physical. A simple "hi" won't do--depending on the situation this is followed by a combination of any or all of the following: "how are you", "good day", "hope your work is going smoothly", "it's so good to see you!", and "it's been a long time!" and more. These are accompanied by physical gestures of greeting which vary depending on the age and gender of the other person. These include nods, clasped hands, hugs, kisses on the cheeks, touching heads, a hand over the heart, or, the ultimate gesture of respect for an aged relative or friend--a kiss of the hand which is then touched to the bowed forehead in respect.

When walking into a crowded living room, one is expected to go through this greeting ritual with each person in the room, even with those not personally known. The long process of going around the room and exchanging greetings with each person felt awkward to me at first. I wondered why a "how's everybody doing" wasn't sufficient. As I've lived here, though, I've grown to understand that greetings communicate value and recognition. I've heard neighbors complain about someone not greeting them on the elevator or in the parking lot and seen their hurt feelings as a result. I've seen aged relatives break into huge smiles when their grandchild greets them respectfully with a kiss on the hand and touch of the forehead. And gradually I have come to value greetings for myself. When someone hasn't greeted me as an individual, I feel unseen, forgotten, not important. When someone makes a point to greet me, I feel special, acknowledged, cared for.

3) Gift Giving

People here love giving gifts to one another, and there is no shortage of occasions for gift-giving. For example, when going to a person's house for the first time, it is understood that the guest will not arrive empty-handed. At the same time it is expected that the host will earnestly protest the gift, insisting that there was no need to go to the trouble! If the gift is food, it will then be "re-gifted" back to the guest and served along with whatever other treats the host has prepared. All of these things, the gift, the protesting, and the immediate use or display of the gift are communications of honor to the host and to the guest.

Another popular occasion for giving gifts is when a friend comes back from a trip. Oftentimes they will bring back a small souvenir for their friends and family such as a magnet or a keychain from the place they visited. It is not uncommon for people's refrigerators and bookshelves to be adorned with souvenirs from all sorts of places they have never been themselves! The point behind these gifts is that the person making the trip thought of and missed the person who stayed behind, so much so that they bought them something. Again, this is a communication of honor.

Sometimes cultural characteristics can be very distinct--setting us apart from one another and showing the differences between us. However, sometimes they can be more blurry. As I think about each of these cultural characteristics of life in Turkey I see similar values and practices in my home culture, albeit sometimes played out in different ways. After all, people are people, whether they live in Turkey, Japan, or the USA. And we all share that fundamental identity of personhood, rendering each of us, no matter our culture or home country, equal in value, dignity, and worth. So whether our cultural distinctives display the rich diversity of human life on this planet, or remind us that we share many beautiful things in common, let's continue to grow in our appreciation and value of one another's cultures.